When To Call Women

Get Her Number Every Single Time

Alexander Graham Bell didn't know what he was starting when he invented the telephone; he never could have predicted the number of problems his invention would cause in relationships.

The phone may be one of the greatest inventions of all time, but men and women still don't know how to use it when it comes to dating. Not to worry: I'll tell you how to use the phone to win her over rather than scare her off.

You Scored The Number

One of the most popular questions in dating these days -- right up there with "How do I approach her?" and "How do I ask her out?" -- is "When do I call her?" In Swingers, Vince Vaughn and Jon Favreau immortalized the "three-day rule." But should you really wait three days?

Let's say you meet a woman at a club. You're both on the dance floor and you're having a great conversation about whether or not there is a life force besides ours. The two of you hit it off and you ask her for her home phone number.

You go home and place the number next to your phone. The note is calling your name, begging you to pick up the phone and give your new friend a call, but of course, you can't call that very same night -- it's 2:00 a.m. That would seem way too eager.

Rules Are Made To Be Broken

There is an unwritten rule that you have to wait a certain amount of time before calling a woman you just met. You don't necessarily have to wait those infamous three days, however; you can throw her a curveball and call her earlier than she would expect.

Not waiting three days doesn't necessarily make you seem overeager; it's what you say and your demeanor on the phone that really matter. Therefore, if you call her on the second day, be calm and collected. Ask her how she's been and chit-chat for a short while, but don't let the conversation drag on. Get to the point fairly quickly; that is, ask her if she's available to go out on a specific date.

After The Fact

So the two of you went out and had a great time together. Within the next couple of days, you should call to tell her that you had a lot of fun and that you'd love to do it again sometime.

This call does not serve the specific purpose of asking her out on another date; it's just to touch bases and show her that you're confident enough to call her again. By not securing another date with her, you'll be catching her off guard once again and subtly easing yourself into her thoughts.

If she doesn't have your number yet, make sure she gets it. Your goal is to give her the option of getting in touch with you if she's in the mood for a spontaneous rendezvous.

What should your next move be?

After the post-date phone call, wait it out. Make her sweat a bit and wonder about you. This is where the all-important intrigue and mystery come in.

If she hasn't called you after several days, give her a call.

leave a message

Now this part is crucial. If she doesn't answer and her voice mail picks up, leave a message. She probably has call display, so she will know you called in any case. If you don't leave a message, she might think you were too nervous or lacked the confidence to leave proof that you called.

Make sure to leave your name and number clearly. Don't blabber on forever, don't sound too serious and don't repeat the information. Make it brief and upbeat, such as: "Hey Kelly, it's John. I hope everything's good with you. Give me a call when you have a chance at [your phone number]."

If you leave a message, it becomes her obligation to call you back. If she doesn't, and you really feel that the first date went well, you can try her again -- but only after a few days.

It's all right to call her even though she hasn't called you back -- but only once. Don't allow her to make a habit of not returning your calls. If she doesn't return your second call, take the hint and don't pursue it. Even if she is interested, it doesn't sound like she has much time to make an effort in developing a relationship.

no answer

This is very important: If there is just no answer every time you call, don't call her every hour. In this day and age, almost everyone has call display; calling obsessively will make you seem like a stalker.

Finally, something that most of us have learned the hard way is that you shouldn't take what other people say too literally. If she says she'll call you on Monday night, for example, do not sit by the phone waiting for her call.

the phone is your friend

So there you have it: Be yourself and pick up the phone. If all goes well, you'll soon be able to use the phone to engage in more than just talking.

Read more: http://www.askmen.com/dating/heidi/28b_dating_girl.html#ixzz1kUm1tQcw